


Rain

by idola



Category: Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-11
Updated: 2016-12-11
Packaged: 2018-09-07 23:08:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8819944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idola/pseuds/idola
Summary: The only constant is the rain. Everything else, everyone else, is subject to change to fit the shape of the surrounding world.





	

Judar woke to Hakuryuu trying to untangle himself from the mess of covers and out of his arms. He woke up to something similar every day around sunrise and usually went back to sleep without thinking too hard about it - instead of convincing Hakuryuu to come back to bed with him he was much more likely to accidentally convince Hakuryuu that he needed early morning magic training.

But today was different. Today it was raining, and not just a little drizzle. Despite being out of season, the rain pounded on the roof in a way that clearly said _you get today off from training, so just relax._ Either Hakuryuu was willfully ignoring it or he didn’t realize that was what rain meant.

“Hey, Hakuryuu. It’s raining.”

“I heard.”

“Lay back down with me.” Judar pulled at Hakuryuu’s waist as if it that was going to convince him. It didn’t, and Hakuryuu immediately moved to pry him off.

“I have work to do. You can sleep in if the rain bothers you though…”

“It doesn’t _bother_ me. It’s telling me that you can’t get anything done anyway in this weather so you better just sleep it out.”

“There are plenty of things to do,” Hakuryuu said, indignant. “Since I have taken the throne I have to closely monitor all of the divisions to make sure they’re doing their jobs right, for one. And I also—”

“Too muddy to walk between palace wings. And it’s too cold out in the rain. Better move your capital somewhere warmer if you want everyone to work on days like this.”

“Then you’d just complain that it’s too hot and say you need midday naps to escape from the heat.”

Judar smiled, nuzzling into Hakuryuu’s side. “You know me so well.”

Hakuryuu sighed. “If there’s really nothing else to do then I can just cook something. By the time I finish the rain might be done.”

“Cook something later. Come on, you’re in a bad spot. Your hip is bony. Move this way.”

Hakuryuu moved as per Judar’s request without thinking, then tried to move away again once he realized he was giving in. Jerk. Judar moved his head on Hakuryuu’s lap to try to keep him from moving anymore.

“What’s up with you today?” Hakuryuu asked. “You never argue with me this early.”

“I just wanna sleep in, is that bad?”

“No, but… normally you sleep in whether I’m here or not.”

Judar laughed a little despite himself, muffling the sound in Hakuryuu’s clothes. “You always get up early whether I’m here or not too.”

“You’re always here now. If I slept in every time you did I wouldn’t get anything done.”

“It’s just one morning, come on.” He was really tired and it was becoming hard to keep up with the conversation. He knew that Hakuryuu often didn’t sleep well either, so he probably felt the same overwhelming sleepiness. It should have made it easier to convince him but really it had the opposite effect - Hakuryuu would get up early specifically because he was tired and needed to ‘walk it off.’ Just sleep, Hakuryuu. Everyone else just sleeps if they’re tired.

A long time ago Hakuryuu slept pretty well, though. So long ago that Judar sometimes doubted it was real. Judar could even recall days where he woke before Hakuryuu to do something for Al-Thamen in the early morning, days where he wouldn’t see Hakuryuu until he woke from a comfortable sleep late in the morning.

He remembered once leaving to practice water magic during the morning showers that were so common in Kou’s foggy springs. Judar had already finished practicing by the time he went inside to see Hakuryuu staring through a window with half-asleep eyes, wishing it would stop raining.

Back then, he told Hakuryuu that he’d master a spell to stop the rain so they could play outside every day even in the spring. Hakuryuu smiled, and made him promise. 

Judar never kept his promise - he wasn’t in the country long enough to give Hakuryuu a whole season of sunshine before the fire. He wondered briefly if Hakuryuu even remembered the promise. Usually, Judar didn’t either. The sound of the rain brought it to mind, that was all.

The Hakuryuu back then was all smiles and didn’t really stand out when compared to all his siblings like he did now. Back then he didn’t have a scar and lived a carefree and spoiled life. Not the fake kind of spoiled Judar had, but the real kind of spoiled where everyone really cared if he was happy because he was the baby of the royal family and his smile warmed their hearts. Now that Judar thought about it, maybe Hakuryuu was fond of him back then. He couldn’t really remember. It was a long time ago.

“…Judar?”

“What?”

“I thought you might have fallen back asleep.”

Hakuryuu seemed to have relaxed into a semi-comfortable position, half laying down and half sitting against a pillow. If Judar kept at it a little longer he would win the battle. He moved to bring his head to Hakuryuu’s chest. It was more comfortable but not by a lot.

The Hakuryuu of the present only had a few things in common with his past self - worrying about all the little things that no one else even noticed, teasing him because he liked to get a reaction. And he got lonely easily even if he would never say it. Other times he was someone else, a shadowy picture of someone who Judar might have met long ago. Someone who Hakuryuu wasn’t that he always took the time to try to be.

His subconsciousness offered an answer. A man who was strong enough to pick him up and spin him around but never did because he had Hakuryuu and Hakuei for that. A man who Hakuryuu used to spend all his time boasting about, never even considering that he could become just as great. Not the same person, but two people who had almost been able to live on as one thanks to Hakuryuu diligently preserving their memory. His brothers.

If Gyokuen hadn’t amassed enough black rukh to spin the wheel of fortune, the Hakuryuu beside him would be unrecognizably different. He would be alone as the sole fallen magi in a world of white, standing in the shadow of the radiance of the first and second princes. No king would take his hand in that world. They would have no reason to abandon the beautiful life they were born into for him.

Judar was tired. Thinking about the past wasn’t helping him stay awake, either.

“If you’re really just going to sleep then I am going to leave.”

“Stay,” Judar mumbled. “When we were kids…”

For a few seconds Hakuryuu waited for Judar to finish. When it seemed like he wasn’t going to, Hakuryuu prompted him to continue. “When we were kids?”

“I don’t remember well. But I think sometimes you haven’t changed much.”

Hakuryuu didn’t respond. Maybe he didn’t like being told that.

“The rest of the time… you try really hard, don’t you. But that’s something I like about you… Your brothers, what were their names again? I never saw them much because they were always at war, and I was always away, and…”

Judar yawned. He almost lost his train of thought but Hakuryuu’s tense body made him remember. “Hakuryuu,” he mumbled. “They aren’t the ones I chose as my king. Neither of your brothers are. You are. Even though you’re so high strung.”

“Why are you bringing this up now?” Hakuryuu asked. Of course he had to ask, because he didn’t want to say the wrong thing. It was strange to Judar who often spoke without thinking that Hakuryuu always tried consider a variety of factors before responding.

Judar was learning from their time together - not the time they spent as kids together, no, the time they have been Magi and king - that Hakuryuu did all these little things to figure out what he was going to say before he even said it even when there was no risk of being tried for treason or anything like that. That was just how he was.

Because he was careful to make sure that what he was saying would be something his brother would say. And he was careful because he didn’t want Judar to get bored and leave him. The fact that it was so obvious Hakuryuu relied on him to keep a sound mind made Judar’s insides warm. It was sweet. Sinbad and Kouen would have never relied on him for that. Only Hakuryuu who didn’t have anyone else and was so desperate to not be alone.

“You try really hard, Hakuryuu. I bet you try even harder than your brothers did.”

“That’s enough.”

“Of what?”

“All of it. Go to sleep.”

Maybe Hakuryuu thought he was being made fun of. That wasn’t really true. Or at least not intentionally true. As a Magi he was supposed to spend his life next to a king of his choosing, and he had chosen Hakuryuu. In some ways it was comparable to marriage - or at least, the kind of relationship he _wanted_ with his king was. 

In the past he had never been with any of his kings like this so Judar liked to think that Hakuryuu was special. Seeing anyone else’s face so early in the morning would just piss him off. 

Or maybe it was just a phase and when Hakuryuu burnt out Judar would find someone else like he had done in the past. He didn’t want to keep abandoning his kings, back then. Not really. It was just that Falan or Ithnan or Gyokuen would tell him that there was a change of plans, or that they’d found someone who he ought to meet.

Then they’d never mention the old kings again. It wasn’t long before Judar knew to view them as disposable.

He didn’t want to dispose of Hakuryuu like that. He was enjoying himself too much for it to end. Much more than he enjoyed being with any of his other kings - or his past kings, rather - like those old generals liked to remind him, Hakuryuu was his only king now. He abandoned everyone else for Hakuryuu alone in return for Hakuryuu doing the same.

It wasn’t much of a sacrifice for either of them.

Though Judar had never technically been alone, he wasn’t able to accept the people he chose after seeing the truth of his parent’s circumstances. When he saw the kings Gyokuen had guided him to take, anger pulsed somewhere under his skin. He wasn’t angry at Kouen or Koumei for it, not really. They didn’t force him to take them to conquer dungeons. Far from it. He was just angry and he didn’t know what exactly he was angry about. Something below the surface that was never direct and never spoken about that he couldn’t quite understand. Looking at the people who understood his circumstances long before he did, and continued to take advantage of him despite knowing, he almost felt violated.

He didn’t feel that when he looked at Hakuryuu.

…The point of it all was that he _did_ care about Hakuryuu and Hakuryuu’s feelings even when they were inconvenient or hard to deal with, like right now. Because Hakuryuu was the one he had chosen to be with. There were other people who were stronger and other people who would have had the same goal in mind, but Hakuryuu was the only one who really understood.

It went without saying that he liked Hakuryuu because they shared the same anger. But there must have been something else too... Something that made their touches warm instead of stiff and let them spend their mornings and evenings together without tiring of each other. Judar didn’t understand his own feelings sometimes.

Judar opened his tired eyes and look up at Hakuryuu. His hair fell over his eyes in a way that reminded Judar of his oldest brother who would laugh off any jealous insults Judar tried to throw at him as a kid to win Hakuryuu’s attention over. He couldn’t have been older than five then. Sometimes he almost forgot that world existed it was so far from what they’d grown into.

“It’s not like I’m trying to ruin his memory for you or anything,” Judar said, closing his eyes once more. “And I don’t care either way if you want to keep acting like him or not. I just like you, you know? You behind him.”

Hakuryuu didn’t say anything. He probably didn’t know what to say. Judar didn’t know what to say either and wasn’t sure why he had said all of that to begin with. Some lingering nostalgia, maybe. Hakuryuu had plenty of that, so he was sure to understand.

It was still early and Judar would likely forget their conversation ever took place the next time he woke up. Hakuryuu might, or he might not. It didn’t really matter either way. What mattered was that Hakuryuu relaxed, all thoughts of working early gone from his mind. Victory was Judar’s.

Judar could feel his consciousness fading into sleep again when he felt a light hand on his head.

Hakuryuu’s hand rubbed his hand back and forth through Judar’s hair, the way Judar always did it to him. It felt nice.

The rain lightened up enough for Judar to realize that Hakuryuu was talking, softly, like he wasn’t sure if he wanted to be heard or not.

“I’m sure there’s a real you, too. Behind all the things Al-Thamen told you to be.” He moved a long strand of Judar’s hair behind his ear. “I don’t think I’ll ever meet that Judar. Not here. But I think that I would like to.”


End file.
